Thursday, August 10, 2017

Dolly had braces

I'm not normally a victim of the Mandela effect.  Even in cases where I don't remember correctly, like the whole "mirror, mirror" thing from Snow White, I'm not wedded to the version I remember.  I can view the actual (magic mirror) version, give a dispassionate shrug, and go on with my day.

I have The Empire Strikes Back on both VHS and DVD, and have seen the movie many times, and I've always known it was "No... I am your father" instead of "Luke, I am your father."

I never thought Mandela died in the 1980s.

Berenstain, Berenstein... who cares?

Etc.

But there's one thing upon which I will absolutely not budge, and that's the matter of Dolly from Moonraker.  She had braces.  I don't care about all the evidence to the contrary.  The girl had braces.  And I'm not just inventing this memory ex post facto, because it dates back to the 1980s when I first saw the movie on TBS.  The whole "connection" between Dolly and Jaws was the fact that both had mouths full of metal.  Otherwise, the relationship makes no sense.  Well, it makes sense for Jaws, because Dolly was gorgeous, and it's easy for a man to be smitten with her.  But it doesn't make sense on Dolly's end.

So, assuming I'm correct, what's the explanation?

My theory: the version of the movie that aired on TBS--which is where a lot of us saw a lot of movies for the first time back in the day, because other channels didn't share Ted Turner's tastes--featured a braces-positive Dolly.  The braces were later edited out for VHS and DVD and whatnot, and for reasons I can only guess.  So perhaps Ted Turner has the answer.

This isn't the first time that I remember something from a movie from the 1980s that would later get edited out.  Throughout the 1990s, I distinctly remembered the sentry guns scene from Aliens, yet none of the videos or televised versions had that scene.  It wasn't until the Youtube era that I found that scene again.  It had been deleted, and was only reinstated for the director's cut.  When I first saw the movie back in the 1980s, it must have been on laser disc or something--some pre-edited version.  I remembered the sentry guns, and my memory was correct.  Same thing with Excalibur.  In the wedding scene, Merlin tells Morgana that she'll "have to do better than that" to convince him of her prophetic gift.  In the deleted scene, she goes on to predict that Guinevere will cheat on Arthur with Lancelot.  That line is missing from the movie now, and I can't find it anywhere.  But I know it was there once upon a time.

So Hollywood has a history of messing with us.  I think something like that's the explanation for Dolly's missing braces.



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